I’ve first met David Tang at China Exchange event. He was a very confident and bossy man in charge who seemed was not afraid to upset or insult someone. It seems I am not the only one who has this kind opinion.

Geordie Greig, editor of The Mail on Sunday, notes: ‘David Tang does nothing by halves. No one can be kinder, ruder, more opinionated, humbler, more discreet or gossipy, but no one is more generous. British knight, the Chinese entrepreneur, Cuban cigar king, classical pianist, hip-hop aficionado, bon viveur, teetotaller, always he is the man with the last word. He spans a social circle that is as wise, spicy and serious as it is fun and social. No one would be bored with him on a desert island, but remember he is very, very bossy. He would be in charge’.

Before meeting David, I’ve heard about him as the most connected man in London. I am always developing my networking skills so I asked him at one of the events about his networking secrets. He told me couple things but shared even more with the newspapers. So, below are the networking rules according to David Tang

Most important rule of meeting people – “If you want to meet people, make sure they want to meet you even more”. And when you are meeting people, have something to say and don’t be intimidated. According to David Tang, ‘You’ve got to tell them something new. If you’re intimidated, the thing is not to show it. Intimidation comes from you, not them’.

In these days many people are looking only for the benefit for themselves. David told me that if you want to have friends, you have to remember that friendships are for pleasure, not practicality. If you can make people laugh and don’t be cynical or sycophantic, then they will always have pleasure meeting you. At one of the newspapers David shared an example:’Tell them exactly what you think, but try to make them laugh. I met an absolutely perfect girl and thought: “How can I make her interested in seeing me?” So I asked for her telephone number. She burst out laughing’.

Sometimes we simply don’t want to do some of the things and doesn’t matter how much our friends insist. I am guilty of that. I am afraid to say no, so I would not loose friends. But this thinking is not very good for me. I realized people stopped respecting my time because they assume I will not say “no”. In this case, David Tang advises having an excuse. He has a standard phrase: “Alas, no, for reasons with which I will not bore you,” then they assume you’ve got cancer, or what have you.’

David Tang believes that intelligent conversation is the main purpose of human gatherings, so he advises turn off the mobile phone, to leave generous tips for anyone who has served you. I personally liked the rule to turn off the music during dinners so people could have proper conversations. I noticed that very often loud music at the bars and clubs gets in the way of meeting new people.

If you want to learn more secrets about networking and modern etiquette from sir David Tang, you can buy his book on Amazon.

Sources & photo: Evening Standard, Daily Mail.

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